Finally

I got a speeding ticket today.   It was the first ticket I’ve gotten in over 15 years.   I was shocked!   I’m not really shocked that I got one.   After all, I was completely guilty.   I was shocked it had taken so long for me to get one.    On my way to work, I drive a stretch of Highway 26 in Oregon, just leaving Portland, where the posted speed is 50 MPH.  I routinely drive that stretch between 65 and 90.    There is a truck lane on the far right where you can easily blow by most of the traffic.   Most cars won’t go over there, and the trucks are easy enough to get around.  That’s exactly where I was today.    I was pretty lucky because I had just gotten around some trucks and had not reached full speed when I passed the Portland Police Officer.   He only got me at 74.   I easily could have been going much, much faster.   I’m now $287 poorer.  It should probably teach me a lesson about driving too fast.   It doesn’t though.   It taught me that I can pretty much drive as fast as I want and it will only cost me just over $.05/day.

Hiding Out

I’ve been hiding out quite a bit lately.   I’m afraid that many of my friends think that this is because I’m being aloof, or not interested in sharing my thoughts with them.   This is not true.  The fact is that I’ve not shared my thoughts with them because I’m still not sure what my thoughts really are.  I still have a lot of conflicting feelings and I don’t like trying to explain things that I don’t understand.   I hope that my friends understand that I care about them deeply and that I treasure the relationships I’ve built over time.   I hope that they also understand that I have things that I will always keep private.   The reasons I have for some of the actions I’ve taken recently are never going to be completely explained.   That’s because some of them are very private and I have no interest in discussing them with anyone.   Some of them are also unexplainable because they are based on gut feelings that require all of my experiences, intuition, hang-ups, and values to understand.  

 

Never forget how much I care about all of you that are close to me. 

China Grove

Something that I found pretty interesting happened to me this week.   It was a very odd coincidence, or was it?

I got up on Sunday morning and decided to walk to the store to get breakfast.   I do that a lot on the weekends.   I like to get up, walk down to the store and wander around until I find something to eat.   Of course, we’ve been over this behavior before in a previous post.   In any case, it was about 8:30 in the morning and I was walking down to the store when a song popped into my head out of nowhere.    It was a song that I like, but one that I hadn’t heard in a least a year, maybe way more.   It was China Grove by the Doobie Brothers.   

“… and his buddies with their Samurai swords, you can even hear the music at night”, I sang away as walked.

Well, that might have been the end of the story, and quite a boring story it would have been but then the strange part happened.   I listen to the radio station KNRK when I drive, almost all of the time.   It’s a little hard to define their format anymore, but they mostly play music from the 80s, 90s, and new stuff.   It’s safe to say they that it would be very rare day that they would play any Doobie Brothers.    Each morning though they do a segment called the “Eight at Eight”.   It a group of 8 songs that have a common thread and yesterday morning they were doing a sibling theme.     The last song, which came on at 8:30, was China Grove.  

Prescience?   I think so.

Of Two Minds

I often find myself conflicted.   I seem to have a strange ability to be able to see both sides of any decision and find the positive in either one.   Another way to say this is that I seem to be able to see the negative in either one.   This means that no matter what I choose, it’s always wrong.   I suppose it’s always right as well but I like to look at world as being glass half-empty.

This constant “conflictedness” seems to be getting worse as I get older.   I find myself sitting right at 50% on really big decisions.   This means that the deciding factors can be really small.   I sometimes sit and agonize over decisions finding that I really fall right in the middle on what I think the right thing to do is.   I can see the benefits of both courses of action.   I can also see the pitfalls, the pain, and the various negative repercussions of both.    Is this a kind of wisdom, or a kind of wishy-washyness?

I'm Back

So I’m sure that many of my loyal reader were wondering if I would ever write again and I’m here to tell you the answer is an emphatic yes.   I’ve gone though many changes over the last three and a half months, but I’m back and ready to entertain you with more anecdotes about my life.  I’ve had some interesting experiences recently, many of which beg for web chronicling.   I’ve met 2 more angels (the kind that come from heaven), cried, crashed a wedding, met a gay man named Fox, ran a marathon, had my nipple pierced, sold a house, bungee jumped, bought a television, danced, and nearly died at least three times.  It’s been a strange time.   I’ve got some stories for you, for sure.

I’ve missed writing.  A few of you have asked if I would write again.   Yesterday someone reminded me that I do actually have a few readers.   I will attempt to be more consistent going forward.   Watch the Semicolon Blog.   You might find some prescience.  You might find some entertainment.  You might find a story you weren’t expecting.   You might not.   I’ll see you here.  Same bat time, same bat channel.

Happy 4th

We can own property.
We can live with who we want.
We can own guns.
We can burn the American flag.
We can hang our leaders in effigy.
We can shout hatred or love.
Happy 4th, remember what freedom means, or at least what it should.

Lucky

                I never ceased to be amazed at the power of luck.  I’ll begin by saying that I don’t really believe in luck.  I believe in mathematics.  I believe in probabilities.  I have a pretty good grasp on them.   When I come to Las Vegas, I tend to gamble.  When I sit down to gamble, I understand in each game how the house has an advantage.  I accept this advantage and I play anyway.   I tell myself I’m playing for fun.

                All of my logic doesn’t really seem to matter when I play.   I’m either lucky or not lucky.  I either win or I lose.   I know that on the grand scale those are the only two options, but I’m talking about something different.   I either win constantly or I lose constantly.   I played last night and lost 8 straight hands of Pai Gow.   The probability of this happening is astoundingly high.   I play Pai Gow because the house advantage in this game is very easy to understand.   The house has one advantage.   The bank, which is usually also the house, has another one.   The bank wins all ties.   You are welcome to become the bank anytime you win, just be sure you have enough money to cover the entire table.   The house collects a royalty on all winning hands.    This means that even if you win, the house keeps a little bit of your money.   I think this is okay.   They have to pay the dealer, keep the lights on, and deal with me after I’ve been playing and drinking for several hours.   I accept this as an okay deal.

                Back to last night, the odds of winning a given hand are nearly equal between you and the house.   If you take over banking, then they are equal.   That means that on the grand scale you should win as many hands as the house.   Therefore, based on probability, I shouldn’t lose 8 straight hands.   I simply was not lucky last night.  Oh well, maybe tonight will be better, or more accurately stated, maybe tonight will seem better.

Restroom Attendent

                I went out to eat last night in Las Vegas.  I’m here for a conference and I went with a couple of people I met here, along with some friends and friends of friends.   The place was Todd English’s PUB, which is in the new City Center complex.    The City Center complex is interesting.   It doesn’t really feel like Las Vegas in there, which is kind of cool.   The restaurant had good food, but there was something else about it that I really liked.

                When I got up to go to the restroom, I wandered over through a door that was marked as such.   When I entered I was a little startled because I found myself standing in the restroom sink area and there was a female restroom attendant.   She had all of the various restroom sundries like cologne, hairspray, and combs and things.   I thought I had walked into the wrong restroom.   I hadn’t though.   There were separate water closets for men and women, but the sink area was shared.   This allowed for the single attendant.   I like using restrooms that have a restroom attendant and maybe they would be more common if more restrooms were laid out this way.   I didn’t have any small money so I couldn’t tip the attendant, but I may go back and take care of her later.

Hiatus

I’m taking a short hiatus from writing.   I was getting a bit burned out.   I’ll resume in a few days.

Credit

                I have an American Express card that I try to use for most of my purchases.   I like it because it pays me cash back.   It’s pays a pretty minimal percentage of my purchases until I hit a certain amount of expenditures for the year. I usually hit that amount within the first two months.   After that, it pays 1.5% back on most purchases, but a whopping 5% back on gas, groceries, or drug store purchases.   I spend a lot of money at the grocery store, so I really like this card. 

                Like most credit cards my American Express has a monthly credit limit.   It’s pretty high.   I didn’t think that I would ever be able to hit it.   I was wrong.  Over the last two months I bought a few big ticket items, had some significant work related expenditures, and went on vacation.   The purchases on this card climbed up and reached my credit limit.   I considered calling them and asking them to raise my limit.   I then thought to myself, “Why would I do that?   I have the money.   Why don’t I just send them an unscheduled payment so that I don’t hit the limit?”   It was pretty easy; the problem was solved.

                I’m annoyed that the United States Congress is considering raising our national debt limit.   I understand why we need to; it’s because we DON’T have the money.  It’s just not there and so we need to borrow more in order to keep things going.   What the heck, people?   Do you think this can go on forever?   I wonder how much American Express would be willing to raise my limit.   I guess if I kept paying the interest, they would raise it pretty high.   I wonder how long it would be before I couldn’t pay the interest anymore.   What would happen then?

Choices

                I bought a new pair of golf shoes yesterday.   I played in the morning and my old pair were really hurting my feet.  Since I was planning on playing again today, I knew I’d better get some new ones.

                I didn’t really want to drive all the way into town to go find golf shoes, so I just went down to the pro shop at the golf course here on the resort where my vacation house is.   I was surprised how small the selection was.   They only had 2 models.   They had FootJoy Contour and FootJoy Superlites.   The last time I bought golf shoes I tried on about 15 different pairs.  It was a long process to find exactly the right ones.  It’s worth noting that now those perfect shoes hurt my feet.   I certainly would not have that same luxury this time.  I tried on exactly one pair and then I bought them.  They are the Superlites, size 9, wide.  I love them.   They feel great and they are very light indeed.  

I was thinking that it is kind of liberating to not have so many choices.   Having choices seems like it should be great, but not having choices makes things so much easier.  I have a tendency to analyze every aspect of every choice I make.  It’s taxing mentally.   I don’t think I want to give up all of my choices, but I certainly don’t mind occasionally taking a little vacation from them.  

Mayonnaise

                I whipped up, literally, some homemade mayonnaise yesterday.  I had been meaning to do this for a while and I finally got around to it.   I have a mission to make all of my favorite condiments from scratch and mayonnaise was the next on my list.   I made quite a few mustards a while ago; those are quite easy.   I was surprised at how easy mayonnaise was.

                I looked up a recipe on the Internet.  There were tons of them, but they were all pretty similar.  The one I chose consisted of…

                Egg Yolk

                Olive Oil

                Lemon Juice

                White Vinegar

                Dijon Mustard

                Salt

                Pepper

                I used a wire whisk to beat the yolk, mustard and salt.  I then added the some of the oil very slowly and whisking all the time.   I then whisked in the lemon juice, vinegar and pepper.   Finally I whisked in the rest of the oil, again adding it very slowly.   Then, voila, I had mayonnaise. I also had a very tired arm.   I tasted my new creation and decided to add a bit more salt and vinegar.   These final editions brought it around to what I was looking for.  

                I used my mayonnaise to make a turkey sandwich.   It was good.   It didn’t taste, or really look like, store bought mayonnaise.   It tasted very strongly of olive oil.  This is not at all a bad thing, but it is worth noting.   I’m going to use the rest of it today to make myself a BLT.  I’m curious how it’s developed after spending a night in the refrigerator.   I’ll also probably try a few variations on the recipe over the next few months.  After that, it’s on to ketchup.

Lucky

                I suffer from allergies.   This time of the year my nose runs like a faucet.  My eyes sting and water, my throat is scratchy, and occasionally I get sinus infections that feel like someone has poured acid up my nose.   It’s not pleasant.  I sometimes feel like I got ripped off by having allergies.   Why did I have to get them?   I really like to spend time outside and I shouldn’t be burdened with this misery.

                I really can’t spend too much time thinking like that though.  I have to remind myself of the positive things I got.  I’m 43 years old and I still have all of my hair.  (Well, almost all)  I’m probably slightly smarter than average.  I have a good job.   My senses all work well.    I don’t have cancer, or heart disease, or even high blood pressure.   I’m pretty darn lucky overall.     All I got stuck with is these stupid allergies, and that’s only 3 months a year.

Security, again...

I went through airport security today.   It was my 5^th time in 12 days.  I’m sure you’re getting tired of hearing about it.   I really just can’t get over how silly it is though.   I’ve decided that they want to make it unpredictable.   It must be one of the goals of the TSA to make it different each time.   I’m sure this is so that the terrorists will get confused on their multiple trips through.

When I passed through on Tuesday people were passing through the magnetometer with no problem.  There was, however, a big backup in my line passing through the bag x-ray.   I tried to help the situation by moving from the x-ray line and passing through the magnetometer.   I passed through no problem.  The lady TSA agent told me that that I need to go back.   I asked why and she said that I need to go back and push my bags into the x-ray machine.

“Sorry”, I said, “I guess I was depending on my fellow man.”

I went back, pushed my bags in, and passed through again.

Today as I was standing in line it was exactly the opposite.   The line had backed up at the magnetometer and the x-ray was moving well.   I stayed with my bags to ensure that I pushed them all the way through the x-ray machine.   The TSA agent came over and told me that I should move to the magnetometer line.

“Don’t worry, I’ll push your bags through for you”, she said.

If I’m going to fly this much I think I’m going to need to learn to accept the randomness of this process.   If not, I’m going to go insane.

Just below the surface

I had dinner last night on the gulf coast of Florida.   I was sitting on a boat dock overlooking a marina, the Gulf of Mexico beyond that.   My view was to the west and I watched the sunset while eating a dozen oysters.  I was with good people and we laughed.   The scene was beautiful.  I enjoyed it, for the most part.

                What detracted from my enjoyment was the thought that the Gulf of Mexico is still a mess.   That beautiful sunset was over water that still washes up tar balls every day.  That water is the life blood of fishermen who still struggle with the effects of the BP oil spill.   Cleanup efforts continue to try and rectify a situation that will affect a generation, or more.   It’s too bad.

                I also drew some parallels from those dual thoughts.   It’s amazing how things can sometimes seem so great on the outside but once you dig in you find so many problems.  It’s easy to be caught up in the superficial beauty without understanding the troubled interior.   By the same token, things that seem problematic on the outside can have a wonderful and pleasing quality that lies just below the surface.   In either case, the problems are worth solving.

Know your Therapist

I had an interesting massage last night.  I had left my hotel to go to dinner.  I had to walk about 1/4 mile to get to the restaurant that I had found on Yelp.   It was Thai food and it was good.   When I was done with dinner and was headed back to my hotel, I passed by a Hand Rolled Cigar place where I had purchased cigars in the past.   I considered going in, but decided against it.   It always leaves me a little hoarse the next day and I knew I would need to speak today.   I also passed a massage place.   It was called "Eastern Spa" and there was an Asian girl standing outside smoking.    

“Hmmmm”, I thought?   “This looks like a house of ill repute.”

Oh well, my calves have been aching since this weekend and I’ve been dying to get a massage.   I mean, com’on,  it’s a strip mall in Oldsmar; how could it be one of THOSE places?

The sign said that they were open until 11:00 and that “walk-ins were welcome”.   I ventured inside.   There were two Asian ladies in view.   One was older and sitting in a chair.  The other was younger, wearing sweatpants and a tee shirt.  She was sitting at a reception counter.   I walked over to the younger one.

“Do you have space for walk in”, I asked?

“How long you want?”

“Uhhhhhh,  30 minutes, I guess.”

“No problem.  Forty five dollar.”

“Okay”, I said. I handed her my American Express card.

“No ‘merican express, okay?”

“Oh sorry”, I told her.  I pulled out my Visa.

“Okay”, she smiled. “No problem”

“Right now”,  I asked?

“Yes, yes now!”

She walked me back to a massage room.   It looked normal enough.  There was a massage table.   She showed me in and then promptly left.   There was no explanation.  No instruction.   “This doesn’t matter”, I thought.   “I’ve had plenty of massages.”   I will just undress and lay down on the table.  Well, it wasn’t that simple.   There was no cover sheet like you normally find.   It was just a single sheet.   There were some small towels.   I think that maybe I was supposed to lay on top and cover my bare ass with a hand towel.   I opted to just keep my underwear on.   I undressed down to my skivvies and lay down on the table.   I put my face in the circle at the end of the massage table.   It was covered with a Bounty paper towel that had a hole cut in the middle.  “This is a quality place”, I thought. 

The same girl from the reception counter came in and approached the table.

“I really just want you to focus on my legs, my lower legs”, I told her.

“What, no back?”

“You can do my back some, but I really want you to focus on my legs.”

“I have to relax whole body!”

“Okay.”
                She started in the massage.   It kind of sucked.   The pressure was weak.   The technique was amateur.  She rubbed my back and then my legs.  She didn’t dig into the problem calves, but she did briefly rub them.  

My best guess is that they place was opened by the owner of the manicure and pedicure place that was next door.   They must have decided that it was a logical extension to their business.   In the end it was just a poor use of $50.   My calves still hurt.   I guess it pays to know your massage therapist and doing a walk in somewhere at 9:30pm is not the way to get a quality massage.  Live and learn.

Service

                I occasionally get up and walk out of restaurants if I’m not happy with how fast I’m waited on.  I think I’m pretty generous with how long I will wait, but there comes a point where it’s just time to leave.   It’s usually about 10 – 15 minutes for me.   If you can’t get to my table in that amount of time, then I don’t need to patronize your establishment. 

                I’m traveling today and I decided to sit down and have breakfast at the airport.  The service was pretty slow.   There aren’t a lot of options at PDX though, and I didn’t quite hit the 10 minute mark, so I ultimately ordered my breakfast.   She had to come back and ask some clarifying questions after my initial order.  It was okay.  She did seem busy. 

                While I was eating my two sides of bacon I noticed a guy sit down next to me.   He had his iPad out and seemed content to wait.   It took a while for her to get to him.   I saw him look around a few times as if he was wondering when she would come.  He would then look back down at his iPad.   She finally got to him and he ordered.   She then went over and took someone else’s order.   After getting that one, she came back to him with a clarifying question.   He seemed really pissed.

                “You know what, NEVERMIND!   I’M DONE HERE!”  He stormed out.

                “Okay”, she said, “Bye”

                I found the whole thing very amusing.  I could easily have been in the same place.   If I was in a hurry, or more frustrated for whatever reason, I could see myself reacting in a similar way.   It’s funny to see someone else do it.  I guess people probably chuckle to themselves when they see me walk out of places.   Oh well, patience is a virtue, but bad service is inexcusable.

Disappearing Cloud

I was sitting having lunch while I was on vacation.   The sky was perfectly clear, well almost perfectly clear.   There was one single cloud that was hanging just over the Mayacamas mountains.   The cloud hung there for a few minutes and then it disappeared.   After a few minutes it reappeared.  I sat and watched it disappear and reappear several times.   I decided to catch it on video.   Today’s entry: a disappearing cloud.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7llncBUE8HQ

(if you get bored easily just jump to the last 30 seconds)

Trail Runs

I went for a trail run yesterday in my “barefoot running shoes”.  I realize that’s an oxymoron, but it really is what they are.   I bought a pair of Vibram FiveFingers a month or so ago.   I run in them occasionally.   I don’t go very far when I wear them and I try to stay on dirt or grass.   Those that advocate barefoot running say you should always run that way.  After all, our feet were designed to operate without shoes, why would we need all that protection and padding?  Well, I would propose that our feet were designed to run on dirt and grass, not pavement and concrete.  

In any case I wore them for my trail run yesterday.   There is trail through the woods that starts about ¼ mile from my house and winds its way down to the Oregon Zoo.   I had only been on it once before and I remembered it being about a mile, and relatively flat.    I was wrong on both counts.   It’s actually about .6 of mile and has about 100 feet of elevation change.   That’s a lot of hill in just over half a mile.   It’s all downhill going out, that part was easy.   It’s all uphill coming back, that part not so much.   I wasn’t out for very long since I can run 1.2 miles pretty quickly, but it was still one of the more enjoyable runs I’ve had in a while.   I was alone; it was early so no one was out yet.    There was wildlife along the way.  (Well, squirrels anyway)   It’s really pleasant to be alone in the forest.   

Portland is lucky to have park areas so close to the city where you can feel like you’re deep in the woods.   I really enjoy running that way.   I need to do it more often.

Kick-Ass

I watched an awesome movie last night.   I don’t say that much anymore.   I try to watch movies as much as I can and sometimes they’re good, but it’s rare that I will go out and actively tell people about a great movie that I saw.   I managed to stream this film from Netflix.   I’ve continued my battle with Sony to get my Playstation to work and last night I finally managed to stream movies again.   I watched the movie, “Kick-Ass”.

Kick-Ass is a superhero movie.   It’s a superhero movie in a more realistic way than you normally see.   No one has superhuman powers.   It’s a bit far-fetched, but everything you see is, more or less, possible.   It could happen.   Well, not really, but it’s imaginable and it’s really funny.

Kick-Ass was released in 2010 and was directed by Matthew Vaughn.   It stars Aaron Johnson, Chloe Moretz, and Lyndsy Fonseca.   It also has Nicolas Cage, but it could have been an uncredited role for him.   This is not because the role was small, but rather because it was so understated.   The movie was thoroughly enjoyable on a multitude of levels.

I don’t remember many times when I’ve been able to watch an eleven year old girl kill mobsters.   It’s particularly gratifying to catch it with just the right soundtrack.   You feel good seeing it happen, even though you know you shouldn’t.   You also really identify with Kick-Ass and his struggle to find out who he is.   The movie catches me on a level that is rare.   I highly recommend it.   It might not change your life, but then again?

Laugh for laughter's sake

I was thinking yesterday about how your perception of things is so closely tied to your current mood.   Have you ever been to see a comedian perform?  Of course you have, on TV if nowhere else.  Those first few jokes are the most important.   They have to be really funny.   Once he gets you laughing, he can say just about anything and you keep laughing.   You laughter runs on its own inertia.  I have a group of friends I go out to lunch with about once a week.   When we’re together we laugh just about the entire time.   It’s because we all want to.   If you could hear the ridiculous things we say that elicit laughter from each other I think you would fail to find them as funny as we do.   It’s because we are laughing at the laughter itself. 

The same thing happens with pissiness.   When you’re feeling annoyed at someone or something, you let that run on its own inertia as well.  You get annoyed at everyone and everything.   Nothing is funny.   I saw a hilarious comedian in Las Vegas a few years ago with a friend of mine that was really angry about something.  (I honestly don’t remember about what)    She had a horrible time.   She found every joke to be childish, offensive, or just not funny.   She couldn’t make the leap over to laughing side.   It’s hard to do.  

I should have bought an Xbox 360

I had one of the worst software/electronics experiences of my life yesterday.   That’s saying a lot considering I have been working with software for the past 25 years.   I was so frustrated I nearly threw my Sony Playstation out the window.   I mean comm’on guys, you’re a major company, this is really not that hard.

You may have heard about the hacking of Sony’s Playstation site in the news.   They took their “Playstation Network” off line to fix the problem.   They have since brought it back online.   Since I have been on vacation this hadn’t been much of an issue for me, but last night I wanted to stream something from Netflix.   Here’s how it went down…

·         Fired up the Playstation and the main menu came up fine

·         Navigated to Netflix and launched the application

·         I’m prompted for my Playstation Network password (this is pain in the ass to enter in their interface)

·         Enter the password

·         Error message telling my password is incorrect

·         Enter the password again

·         Prompted that I need to navigate to the Playstation network “Sign In” page

·         Attempt to quit Netflix

·         Prompted that I cannot exit from here

·         Attempt to quit using “Playstation Button”

·         Allowed to quit to the main menu

·         Navigate to Playstation Network “Sign In” page

·         Enter my password again

·         Prompted that “An error has occurred”

·         Return to the Sign In page

·         Enter my password again

·         Prompted that “An error has occurred”

·         Navigate back to the Netflix application (in hopes that I could just get past the Playstation sign in and still use Netflix)

·         Pass through the Playstation sign in page.  (I can see Netflix loading in background)

·         Get to the Netflix main page

·         Prompted that I cannot use Netflix without first signing on to Playstation Network

·         Turn off Playstation

·         Turn Playstation back on

·         Navigate to Playstation Network Sign In page

·         Enter my password

·         Prompted that my password is no longer valid, that email instructions have been sent to me on how to renew my password, and that I will need to renew my password using my computer

·         I go into the other room and pull out my laptop and boot it up

·         Go to my email client, there is no email

·         Return to the Playstation and attempt to sign on again

·         I’m again prompted to change my password with my computer

·         I return to my computer and now I do have an email with a link for changing my password

·         I follow the link and get a page informing me that the system is down for maintenance

·         I checked periodically for the rest of the night and it was always down

So, I’m pretty much dead in the water.   Thanks Sony.   I’m going to remember this.

What's that orange thing?

                I’m looking out the window of my office at the sun.   Well, I’m actually walking the 50 or so yards out of my cube and over to the outside wall of the building and looking at the sun.  There is blue sky.   It looks warm.   I think it is in the 70s today.  I’m afraid to go outside and find out.   I’m afraid I might not come back.   This time of the year in Portland is always interesting weather wise.   You can get tricked by days like today into believing that summer is almost here.   You might forget that in Portland, summer never starts before July 5^th.

I’ve always liked the joke, “Do you know what they call the day after two days of rain in Portland?”

                “Monday”

                It would funnier if it weren’t so true.   I’m actually okay with the rain.   I don’t mind it as long as it gives me a few dry days for golf.  I can live with some misty stuff.   I like the overcast sky, or at least I’ve convinced myself of these things.   On days like today though, I wonder.   It sure looks nice out there.   How many more meetings are on my calendar?   How important are they really?

Security Line

I just went through airport security at San Francisco International.    I’m pretty good at security; I’ve done it a lot.   I have a routine that I follow that works pretty well.   I occasionally screw up by forgetting something, but not often.   Today I was stopped at the magnetometer and had to go back and go through again.   I didn’t set it off; that wasn’t the problem.   I had my hand in my pocket.

“Stop sir”, the TSA agent told me, “your hand was in your pocket.”

“Crap”, I thought.  I went back and passed through again.  Both of my hands were visible this time.  No problem.

 I find myself now sitting here now in the bar having a beer and wondering why I had to take my hand out of my pocket.   Exactly what purpose does this serve?   The magnetometer detects metal, right?   What difference does my hand being in my pocket make?   If I have metal, it should go off.   If I don’t it won’t.   What could I be hiding in my hand that is not just as easily left in my pocket?   I’m sure there is some reason for this procedure.   I’m also pretty sure that it’s stupid, but I can’t seem to figure out what it is.  Any ideas?

I hate you United!

I used to fly quite a bit.   I used to travel from Portland to Boston about once a month.  I did this for several years.   My frequent flyer status was what United Airlines called Premier Executive.  They were pretty nice to me then.   I usually got good seats.  I didn’t get a lot of nickel and diming me on things like baggage or seat upgrades.   I even got a special line at security.   I understand why they treated me so well.   I was worth a lot of money to them then.

I don’t travel as much now.   I also do much shorter trips when I do fly, so it’s hard to achieve any kind of frequent flyer status.   Now that that is the case, I really try to avoid United.   They really treat their regular passengers like crap.   The seats that you get as a regular passenger are really small.  I don’t  begrudge them this, since they’re just trying to make a profit and there are plenty of people that will sit in them to save money.   I just avoid flying them because of it.   I also avoid them for reasons like what happened today.   I arrived at the airport and discovered that my flight was delayed.   Luckily they have an earlier flight that I could stand by for since I arrived early enough.   I just need to pay them another $50 for that privilege.   Really United?  Really?  My flight is delayed and you could get me out on an earlier one, but only if I fork over another $50.  No.  I’m not going to do it, and furthermore I will more actively avoid you in the future for this particular insult.   I will fly Alaska.

Oh wait.   I flew Alaska last month and they told me that I couldn’t stand by for an earlier flight at all.   How long is the Amtrak ride from Portland to San Francisco again?

Up and Back

My vacation is over and I have returned to Portland.  I’m spending less than 24 hours here though.   I’m flying down to San Francisco on a work trip tomorrow.   It’s pretty strange to think that I was just a couple of hours from San Francisco, yet I drove for 9.5 hours to get back to Portland just so that I can fly down there.   It really wouldn’t have worked for me to just stay.  There were too many logistical problems.  In any case, I’m not looking forward to this trip.   I really don’t like traveling.

Golf

I played golf this morning.  I played at Napa Municipal Golf Course.   Don’t let the name fool you.  It was a challenging layout.   I played like crap!   Golf is very funny that way.  Some days things just don’t work.  Shots that you could hit the day before aren’t there.   Your lovely draw becomes a slice, your feel for the speed of the green is completely gone, and it seems like every tree on the course wants to be in your way.  Today was one of those days. 

I played pretty good on Monday.   I shot an 81.   That’s a pretty good score for me, particularly the way I’m playing right now.   Today I shot a 97.  That’s about one stroke per hole.  It doesn’t sound like much when you put it that way, but it is!   It’s horrible.   The difference in how I feel about today’s round versus Monday’s round is night and day.    Today I felt like it was my first time to ever play.   I felt like I couldn’t do anything right.   I walked off the course dejected.  I was embarrassed because I was playing with a stranger.   I thought, “He must think I really suck at this game.”   As we walked off the 18^th green he apologized for his poor play.   I didn’t notice.   I was too busy fixating on my own inability.  

I had 4 pars today.   That must mean that I played 4 holes okay.   I should remember that, but I don’t.   I remember hitting a chip fat while we were playing through another group.   I remember shanking an approach shot and nearly hitting the poor guy mowing the fairway.   I remember stubbing two attempts to pitch out of the trees after hitting a horrible sliced 2-iron.   I should quit this stupid game.   Oh wait.   Think back to Monday.   You were good then.

Logical

I like to think I’m driven mostly by logic.   I really think things through before I do them.  I try to imagine all of the possible outcomes of a decision before I make it.   Sometimes I will really want something, but when I think through the implications of buying it I can see how it would be a bad decision.   Nothing drove this point home further than when I bought a boat a few years ago.   I bought the boat based on an emotional whim.   I didn’t consider how much it would cost to maintain.  I didn’t consider what a pain storing it would be.  I really didn’t consider just how much work a boat really is and how many things there are that can go wrong.  I actually even sank it once.   Damn plug. 

Now I’m older and have a better ability to think through the implications of things.   I purchased a house recently and I considered every cost that would be incurred.  I thought about the taxes and utilities.  I thought about the maintenance.  I considered paint and roofing.   I thought about resale value.   In the end I bought the house because I like it.   Wait, that’s an emotional decision.     I spent almost $1000 on wine yesterday.   I can find no logic in that decision at all.   I just really like wine.  Maybe I’m not as logic driven as I would like to believe.   Perhaps I need to redouble my efforts.

Wine Sonnet

Oh vine my love so true to me you’ll be

You’re fruit hangs sweet it’s color so opaque

I know that soon the vintner’s hand conceives

And draws from you the land and water’s trait

Your stately arms hang long from gentle guide

Green leaves absorb the sun’s bright warming rays

You draw the minerals that the soil provides

And integrate them in your special way

The must you make will blend with native life

And work a magic spell to fine result

Then from the mighty oak you will entice

From once young juice you now become adult

When finally you can feel the cork release

And fill your final destiny to please